Ngenglish Yuk

Apa artinya 'vice versa'?

Vice versa (dibaca vais versa) adalah sebuah bahasa serapan dari bahasa latin. Arti originalnya sendiri berarti "diposisikan sebaliknya", "sebaliknya", ato "terbalik" (dari yang seharusnya). Namun begitu, vice versa sebagai kata keterangan (adverb) yang menjelaskan bahwa kebalikan dari fakta pertama yang dikatakan juga kenyataan. Contohnya:
She hates him and vice versa. (Dia membencinya dan begitu pula sebaliknya).
Fish can't live where we are most comfortable, and vice versa. (Ikan tidak bisa hidup di tempat dimana kita sangat nyaman, dan begitu pula sebaliknya).
I can go to Bali - Jakarta vice versa within 1 day to make this happened. (Saya bisa pergi Bali - Jakarta bolak-balik dalam satu hari untuk membuat ini berhasil.

Best friend of mine sent me this interesting mail.
Hope you enjoy it. :)

----- Forwarded Message -----
When we started school many years ago, we had to learn the ABC...
Kids still do, but the only thing that stayed the same is that A still stands for Apple!
Have a look..!!

A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.

"House" for instance, is feminine: "la casa".

"Pencil," however, is masculine: "el lapiz.."

A student asked, "What gender is 'computer'?"

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether "computer" should be
a masculine or a feminine noun.

Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men's group decided that "computer" should definitely be of the feminine gender ("la computadora"), because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;
2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and
4. As soon as you commit to one,you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

• des·ig·nate  (dzg-nt) tr.v. 
• 1. To indicate or specify; point out. 2. To give a name or title to; characterize. 3. To select and set aside for a duty, an office, or a purpose
• feminine  (fm-nn) adj. 
• 1. Of or relating to women or girls. 2. Characterized by or possessing qualities generally attributed to a woman. 
• masculine  (msky-ln) adj. : 
• 1. Of or relating to men or boys; male.2. Suggestive or characteristic of a man; mannish.

Dear all,

I need help to translate "Ikatan Dinas", and "Program magang" is that "Official
bond" and "Internship Program"? maybe you have another familiar word to put in
on the application letter.

and how to call the "Magang" participant or "Ikatan Dinas" participant?

Many company have their own term for 'magang'. Company A called Internship Program, while company B called Apprenticeship Program.

Apprentice itself defined as "a person who is learning a trade from a skilled employer, having agreed to work for a fixed period at low wages". (this is from google which reflect the actual condition, but it applies on many area not just trading. )

I quote from Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged

apprentice [əˈprɛntɪs]
1. someone who works for a skilled or
qualified person in order to learn a trade or profession, esp for a recognized period

in·tern also in·terne
n.
a. A student or a recent graduate undergoing supervised practical training.

Wikipedia describe internship as a system of on-the-job training for white-collar jobs, similar to an apprenticeship. Interns are usually college or university students, but they can also be high school students or post graduate adults seeking skills for a new career.

Both are correct, although some company may called "On Job Training" also. :)

"Management Trainee Program" is more less same in reality.

I don't know about 'ikatan dinas'. Never heard the translation.

But, yes... it's applied on non-goverment environtment as well. Usually, it's part of education Company-Sponsored Program. Employees shall give their service in the company for certain period after finishing the education.

I don't know what is the correct term for that kind of situation.

Sebagai orang Indonesia yang menggunakan bahasa Inggris sebagai bahasa ketiga (setelah bahasa Indonesia dan bahasa daerah), pantas dimaklumi jika kemampuan 'agak kurang'. Alat bantu berupa kamus ini mutlak diperlukan supaya saya keliatan pinter (walaupun sebenarnya emang engga .. xixixi). Di komputer kantor yang diperkuat Windows XP, ada beberapa software kamus yang saya pake. Diantaranya Oxford Concise Dictionary, dan kamus indonesia – inggris. Juga beberapa kamus inggris online.

Saya sendiri ga terlalu suka pake kamus Indonesia – Inggris (vice versa) saja. Kadang kamus2 ini kurang “menggigit” dalam mengalihbahasakan, nilai rasanya juga agak kurang. Disamping itu, beberapa kamus online malah tidak memberikan hasil yang memuaskan jika kita tidak memasukkan kata dasar. Makanya saya pake kamus Inggris-Inggris juga. Jadi, setelah ketemu kata yang dicari di kamus Ind-Ingg, diliat lagi deskripsi, kelas kata, contoh dan thesaurusnya di kamus Ingg-Ingg. Tujuannya memverifikasi definisi, memperkaya tulisan dan menambah perbendaharaan kata.

Beberapa kamus online Indonesia-Inggris yang menjadi favorit saya adalah (diurutkan dari yang sering dipake):

1. Google Translate: Fitur minimalis ala google, dengan hasil masih minimalis juga, tapi bisa mengalihbahasakan ke lebih dari 58 bahasa asing yang lain.


2. Sederet.com: Kamus lokal ini sudah mempunyai plugin di FireFox. Saya puas dengan kinerjanya jika dibandingkan google translate.


3. kamus.ugm.ac.id : Sangat minimal. Tidak diberikan alternatif lain. Be careful. :)


4. kamus-online.com : Konon, kalau Anda adalah anggota (tentu saja harus membayar), Anda akan melihat lebih banyak hasil. Sayangnya tidak diketahui apakah hasil pencariannya akan lebih baik dari google translate.
   kamus.net : Kosakatanya perlu ditambah lebih banyak lagi.

Sedangkan kamus online Inggris-Inggris yang menjadi favorit saya adalah:

1. The Free Dictionary: ini kamus super lengkap dengan thesaurus, definisi, kelas kata dan contoh kalimatnya dalam satu halaman. Penjelasan dari setiap entri diberikan dari American Heritage Dictionary dan Harper Collins. Search plugin telah tersedia di FireFox.


2. Merriam Webster: kamusnya juga bagus. Hanya saja pencarian thesaurus dipisah. Mendukung bahasa medis dan search plugin tersedia di FireFox.


3. Cambridge Dictionary: Hasil yang diberikan tergantung dari referensi apa yang digunakan. Advance Learner’s akan memberikan hasil yang bervariasi daripada Learner’s. Belum ada pluginnya di firefox. Thesaurusnya entah dimana…


4. Ask Oxford: Ini situs yang juga bagus dan lengkap, walaupun sering membingungkan saya juga. Kalo mencari suatu kata, pastikan anda mencari di bagian di dictionary. Jika mencari di “entire oxford site” untuk kata “concern” saja, memberikan 57 hasil termasuk diantaranya artikel sastra, pembelajaran bahasa asing dan lain-lain. Mungkin cocok buat mahasiswa sastra inggris, bukan engineer kayak saya.
   

1. Strengths is the longest word in the English language containing only one vowel. #dictions
2. Rhythms is the longest word in the English language containing none of the five recognised vowels. #dictions
3. The longest single palindromic word in English is rotavator #dictions. (a rotary tiller for breaking and aerating soil)
4. Euouae, a medieval musical term,is the longest English word consisting only of vowels & the word with the most consecutive vowels. #dictions
5. The longest words with no repeated letters are dermatoglyphics, misconjugatedly and uncopyrightables. #dictions
6. The longest word whose letters are in alphabetical order is the eight-letter Aegilops, a grass genus #dictions
7. Eckler (a journalist) said the longest words likely to be encountered in general text are deinstitutionalization and counterrevolutionaries. #dictions
8. Computer's search in daily activity basis, the longest word is uncharacteristically #dictions

1. good noon, tweeps. I just got an article titled "Words That Don’t Exist in the English Language" #NOTexist.
2. L’esprit de escalier (Fr): The feeling you get after leaving a conversation,when you think of all the things you should have said. #NOTexist. L’esprit de escalier itself means the spirit of the staircase.
3. Waldeinsamkeit: (German) The feeling of being alone in the woods. #NOTexist.
4. Meraki: (Greek) Doing something with soul, creativity, or love #NOTexist.
5. Forelsket: (Norwegian) The euphoria you experience when you are first falling in love. #NOTexist.
6. Gheegle: (Filipino) The urge to pinch or squeeze something that is unbearably cute. #NOTexist.
7. Pochemuchka: (Russian) A person who asks a lot of questions. #NOTexist. (my comment: Pochemuchka is annoying person, eh? :D ).
8. Pena ajena: (Mexican Spanish) The embarrassment you feel watching someone else’s humiliation. #NOTexist.
9. Cualacino: (Italian) The mark left on a table by a cold glass. #NOTexist.
10. Ilunga: (Tshiluba, Congo) A person who ready to forgive any abuse for the 1st time, tolerate it a 2nd time,but never a 3rd time. #NOTexist.
11. In Javanese we have "beras" which means rice but not cooked yet. #NOTexist.
12. In dictionary "beras" & "nasi" equals to rice. but, we know it's not correct, right?

Menggunakan awalan "a" dan "an" dalam bahasa inggris.

Sering orang menghafal awalan "a" dan "an" untuk singular noun (kata benda tunggal) dengan menghafal huruf pertama kata benda tersebut.
"a" digunakan untuk kata benda dengan awalan konsonan, sedangkan "an" digunakan untuk kata benda dengan awalan huruf vokal, a,i,u,e,o.

Perbedaannya dengan awalan "the" adalah "the" digunakan untuk merujuk pada benda tertentu. Sudah pasti.

Contoh:

1. "My son wants a toy for his birthday present." (awalan "a" ditaruh di depan "toy")
2. "Please, somebody call an ambulance!" (awalan "an" di depan "ambulance")
3. "When I was at the zoo, I saw an elephant! and a monkey" (awalan "an" untuk "elephant", dan "a" untuk "monkey").

• "a" untuk singular noun yang diawali dengan huruf konsonan, contoh: a boy; a car; a bike; a zoo; a dog
• "a" untuk singular noun yang diawali dengan consonant sound (bunyi konsonan): a university (dibaca sounds like 'yu-ni-ver-si-ty,' diawali dengan bunyi "y", maka 'a' digunakan); contoh lain : a user; a unicycle
• "an" untuk singular noun yang diawali dengan bunyi vowel, contoh: an elephant; an egg; an apple; an idiot; an orphan
• dalam kasus tertentu, dimana "h" diucapkan, seperti "historical," maka gunakan "an". contoh: An historical event is worth recording. Tapi dalam tulisan, malah "a" yang digunakan. ssst... jangan nanya knp kok ga konsisten. ini bahasa, bukan matematika. :)
  

• An MSDS (material safety data sheet) was used to record the data. (pake "an" karena bunyinya adalah "em-es-di-es")
• An SPCC plan (Spill Prevention Control and Countermeasures plan) will help us prepare for the worst.

how to say snack and snake, then eleven and elephant correctly!

• Snack diucapkan seperti mengucapkan "back"
• Snake diucapkan seperti "fake"(palsu)

• Eleven = ilėfen (ė = ee)
• Elephant = elefæn

Jika di-indonesia-kan, dua-duanya berarti “tepat waktu”. Ah, tapi masak harus ada 2 kata hanya untuk mendefinisikan kondisi yang sama? Pasti ada bedanya…

Dan, ya… memang ada bedanya.

in time ~ 1. Before a time limit expires; 2. Within an indefinite time; eventually
Ada tenggat waktu di sana. Dan jika kita melewati tenggat tersebut, maka kita terlambat dan kehilangan momentum. Contohnya, nonton film di Bioskop. Apa asiknya kita telat 20 menit dari film yang sudah dimulai. Kita kehilangan cerita awal. Contoh lainnya, tenggat waktu dalam pekerjaan. Kira2 apa yang akan menimpa kita, jika kita telat menyerahkan hasil pekerjaan kita? Dimarahin? Dipecat?
Jadi akan lebih baik jika kita menyelesaikannya sebelumnya, bukan?

Please finish this report in time since I will present it in front of board of director tomorrow 8 AM. Can you imagine if we cannot make it on 7 AM?

on time ~ 1. According to schedule; punctual or punctually; 2. By paying in installments.
Harus tepat waktu. Requirementnya ketat banget. Guru saya bilang, “If I said I’ll meet you there on 7, and you come 10 minutes earlier and don’t find me, I’m not breaking my promise. If I come at 7, it means I’m on time.”
Kalo telat 30 detik hingga 1 menit masih bisa ditoleransi. Jika lebih? Wah, saya ngga berani jamin deh. Orang bule terkenal tepat waktu dan ga pake jam karet.


Dalam prakteknya, saya akan selalu menyelesaikan tugas saya sebelum tenggat dan datang sebelum waktu yang dijanjikan, tidak peduli apakah saya diminta on time ato in time. :)

Terkadang, dalam satu dua kali kesempatan, saya membaca email ato surat yang diakhiri dengan "Thanks in advance". Tanya kanan kiri, ternyata artinya (kira-kira), "Terima Kasih Sebelumnya". What a such a nice closing for requisition letter.

Sebagai kata kerja sifat (adjecive) kata ini mempunyai arti, (1) Made or given ahead of time, example: an advance payment. 2. Going before, in front, or forward. Memberikan keterangan bahwa kata benda tersebut dilakukan sebelumnya.

Sedangkan dalam idioms, in advance, memberikan arti Ahead of time; beforehand, sebelumnya.

Beda dengan "before" ato sebelumnya (juga). Before adalah kata keterangan (adverb) yang mempunyai arti (1) Earlier in time, example: They called me the day before, (2) In front; ahead.

Kalo menurut saya sih, "before" ini ada suatu waktu yang dijadikan patokan, dan kegiatan itu dilakukan sebelum patokan tersebut. Misalnya, They promised me to meet on Sunday, but they called me the day before.
Sedangkan "in advance" tidak ada. "Thanks in advance" itu maksudnya ya... terima kasih sebelumnya tanpa syarat dan referensi.

Saya kurang bisa menerjemahkan apa kata Indonesia yang tepat yang bisa membedakan keduanya. Ujung2nya ketemu "sebelumnya", padahal dalam terjemahan bahasa Inggris sudah jelas apa perbedaannya. Saya menduga "thanks before" diterjemahkan secara literally dari "terima kasih sebelumnya". Tidak salah, sih. Cuma kurang tepat dan tidak familiar.

So, next time please say "Thanks in advance" instead of "Thanks Before".

:)

Di tempat saya bekerja, cuti tahunan berarti Annual Leave. Jika ingin minta ijin cuti tinggal bilang, "Bos, I want to take my annual leave from (sebutkan dari tanggal berapa) until (sampe tanggal berapa)". Ato, "Bos, I want to take a vacation for (sebutkan berapa hari) and back to work on (sebutkan tanggal kembali kerja)".

Menyebutkan alasan.
Jika untuk keperluan keluarga, tinggal tambahkan saja alasannya. "Bos, I want a leave for few days because my sister got married, is it OK with you?". Contoh lain, "Bos, I have to go for few days since my wife in hospital and will deliver our baby". Bisa juga, "Is it OK with you if I'm not coming today? I'm not feeling very well today".
Bisa juga, "Bos, I want to take leave for 2 or 3 days for family matter/family business".

Cuti bersama
Cuti bersama bisa diterjemahkan sebagai, "Public leave". Walaupun ada juga yang menterjemahkan sebagai "Forced Leave" karena cuti bersama berarti anda dipaksa cuti. Ada juga yang menterjemahkan Collective Leave. Walaupun begitu, ada juga yang menterjemahkan "Mass Leave". Eh, tau ga? "Mass Leave" adalah istilah dalam dunia HR di India untuk mendeskripsikan cuti secara besar2an oleh karyawan untuk menunjukkan protes !

Propinsi diterjemahkan Province yang terdiri dari Kabupaten (Regency) dan Kota (City). Sepertinya ini umum2 saja dalam struktur daerah di negara2 lain.

Coba kalo Kecamatan dan kelurahan/desa. Kecamatan diterjemahkan sub-district. Loh, districtnya mana? Ya, kabupaten ato kota.. Sedangkan Kelurahan yang dipimpin lurah diterjemahkan Village. Desa? Village juga. Bedanya, lurah tidak dipilih oleh warga kelurahan, tapi ditunjuk oleh pemerintah kota. Sedangkan Kepala desa dipilih oleh warga desa.

Province (Headed by Governor)
Regency (Headed by Regent)/City (headed by Major)
Subdistrict (Headed by Camat) ... I've told you, there's no such thing on UK. Keep it that way.
Village (Headed by Lurah/Head of Desa)

Di Inggris (dimana bahasa ini berasal), tata wilayah dan pemerintahannya lebih rumit daripada Indonesia. Susah ditemukan padanan kata kabupaten, kecamatan, dan Kelurahan. Karena struktur politiknya yang berbeda. Lengkapnya liat disini, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subdivisions_of_England

Di Amerika, tata wilayahnya juga berbeda, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Political_divisions_of_the_United_States

Teman saya sendiri lebih suka mencantumkan alamat kabupaten (nama kabupaten), kecamatan (nama kecamatan), dan kelurahan (nama kelurahan), dalam setiap berkorespondensi dengan rekannya di luar negeri. Demi kemudahan, katanya. Ntar kalo bulenya balesin surat lagi ke sini, biar ga salah alamat. Nah… kan? Pak posnya bisa2 juga bingung… :d

Sumber dari, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Administrative_divisions_of_Indonesia

Birds are singing, the sun is shining and I am joyful first thing in the morning without caffeine. Why you ask? Because it is Word of the Year time (or WOTY as we refer to it around the office). Every year the New Oxford American Dictionary prepares for the holidays by making its biggest announcement of the year. This announcement is usually applauded by some and derided by others and the ongoing conversation it sparks is always a lot of fun, so I encourage you to let us know what you think in the comments.

Without further ado, the 2009 Word of the Year is: unfriend.

unfriend – verb – To remove someone as a ‘friend’ on a social networking site such as Facebook.

As in, “I decided to unfriend my roommate on Facebook after we had a fight.”

“It has both currency and potential longevity,” notes Christine Lindberg, Senior Lexicographer for Oxford’s US dictionary program. “In the online social networking context, its meaning is understood, so its adoption as a modern verb form makes this an interesting choice for Word of the Year. Most “un-” prefixed words are adjectives (unacceptable, unpleasant), and there are certainly some familiar “un-” verbs (uncap, unpack), but “unfriend” is different from the norm. It assumes a verb sense of “friend” that is really not used (at least not since maybe the 17th century!). Unfriend has real lex-appeal.”

Wondering what other new words were considered for the New Oxford American Dictionary 2009 Word of the Year? Check out the list below.

Berikut ini istilah dalam bahasa Inggris mengenai lembaga tinggi negara Indonesia.

• Dewan Perwakilan Rakyat : House of people's representatives / house of representative
• Dewan Perwakilan Rakyat Daerah : Assembly at provincial / regional.
  
• Dewan PD : Leadership of political party at provincial / regional level.
  
• MPR : Provisional people's consultative assembly / people's consultative assembly.
  
• Fraksi DPR : Faction of people's representative.
  
• Staff Ahli : Specialized Staff

Posting sebelumnya memberikan apa dan bagaimana reduced form dari American English itu bisa terbentuk beserta contoh2nya. Nah, kesempatan kali ini saya berikan kata2 lain yang saya kutip dari wikipedia. Monggo disimak.

Bentuk kombinasi dari kata Of, have, and to
Kata 'of', 'have' dan 'to' cenderung diucapkan seperti huruf 'a' (a schwa [ə]). Terkadang ini menimbulkan miss-spelling ato salah ucap karena salah dengar [?]. Misalnya "I could of..." padahal yang bener adalah "I could have..." ato "I could've".

* could have: [ˈkʊɾə], coulda
* must have: [ˈmʌstə], musta
* should have: [ˈʃʊɾə], shoulda
* would have: [ˈwʊɾə], woulda
* it would / it would have: [ˈɪɾə], itta

* a lot of: [əˈlɑɾə], a lotta
* kind of: [ˈkaɪɾ̃ə], kinda
* out of: [ˈaʊɾə], outta
* sort of: [ˈsɔɹɾə], sorta

* going to: [ˈɡʌnə], gonna
* got to: [ˈɡɑɾə], gotta
* have to: [ˈhæftə], hafta
* want to: [ˈwɑɾ̃ə], wanna
* ought to : oughta

Varian dari kata "You"
"You" diucapkan mendekati [jə] (kadang ditulis "ya"); kadang juga tergantung konsonan di depannya, contohnya: (/t/ + /jə/ = [tʃə], and /d/ + /jə/ = [dʒə])

* did you: [ˈdɪdʒə], didja
* did you / do you: [ˈdʒə], d'ya
* don't you: [ˈdoʊntʃə], doncha
* got you: [ˈɡɑtʃə], gotcha
* get you / get your: [ˈɡɛtʃə], getcha
* would you: [ˈwʊdʒə], wouldja

Kata lainnya
* give me: [ˈɡɪmi], gimme
* is he: [ˈɪzi], izee
* is it: [zɪt], ’zit
* isn't it: innit
* let me: [ˈlɛmi], lemme
* don't know: [dəˈnoʊ], dunno
* probably: [ˈpɹɑli], probly
* want a: [ˈwɑɾ̃ə], wanna
* what is that: [ˌwʌˈsæt], wussat
* what is up: [wəˈsʌp], wassup
* what is up: [sʌp], ’sup
* what are you: [ˈwʌtʃə], whatcha
* what do you: [ˈwʌɾəjə], whaddaya
* you all: [jɑl], y’all

saduran dan diterjemahkan sebisanya dari Relaxed_pronunciation

Wanna, Gonna, Gotta, Perkenalan dengan reduced forms.

Ini kosakata yang tidak diperkenalkan oleh para guru bahasa Inggris kita. Tapi, kita mengenalnya lewat teks lagu, dari film, artikel ato sumber lainnya. Beberapa referensi mengatakan bahwa ketiga kata ini sebagai perubahan bentuk kata di dalam bahasa Inggris Amerika.
Rosanne Skirble dalam Wanna, Gonna, Hafta: Getting Relaxed With Reduced Forms in Speech di situs VOA news, mengatakan apa penyebab kata2 baru ini:

And what I found was speed of speech was statistically significant as a cause for reduced forms, not informality. Though in informal speech we tend to speak more quickly, and so we think it's the informality, but actually it's the speed of speech."

• What you wanna do now? (Instead of: What do you want to do now?)

• What we gonna do now? (= What are we going to do now?)
• We're gonna carry on and try and get there before dark.
  

• A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do
• I gotta / I've gotta phone home right now. My mum'll be worried.
  

• Scores of Britney Spears wannabees raided the shops where she had bought her latest outfit.

• Are you going to college when you leave school? ~ Dunno!
• Will you quit your job if they re-locate to Manchester? ~Dunno!

(I got it from one of my friend. I don't know whether it's true story or not. Enjoy ! ) ^_^

There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause".

Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. Now I know why they record these conversations!

Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall.
Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."
Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not??"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power...................................... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??"
Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're too f*%king stupid to own a computer!!!!!"

New Vocabularies:
f*%king : is polite way to say harsh and dirty word. You can suspect it.
Unplug : [v.tr] To disconnect (an electric appliance) by removing a plug from an
failure : [n] A cessation of proper functioning or performance
lean [v.intr] To rely for assistance or support
look back [v. intr] perceive with attention
notice [v. tr] To take notice of; observe
cord [n] An insulated flexible electric wire fitted with a plug or plugs.
sudden [adj] Happening without warning; unforeseen:
termination [n] The act of terminating or the condition of being terminated.
transcribed [v.tr] To make a full written or typewritten copy of (dictated material, for example)
Helpline [n] telephone line operated by a commercial organization to provide information